God In A Box.

For the control freaks...

Maybe it's just me, but, have you ever had that "what in the entire hell" moment when you realized the LAST person you expected to be married, is married? And maybe it's not marriage. Maybe it's the guy who was a complete dingbat in high school that now runs his own company while you took every lesson seriously and make half what he does. Or the girl who you thought was dumber than a bag of rocks that now has her own boutique and is somehow keeping kids alive. Am I the only one? Ok... well if I am…allow me to reveal the rest of my heathen thoughts.

Listen, you can call this whatever you want. Jealousy. Comparison. The list can go on and on. But these are the moments that genuinely leave me "shook." Those narratives that you're reading in real life knowing good and well that the only way it happened was by the sheer grace of sweet Jesus himself.

Now let me very honestly admit: usually my immediate reaction is a "wow, God. WOW!" And it's not like an "awe" type of wow. It's usually the kind of WOW you give to a dude that just lied straight to your face. Kind of like how Jonah was probably feeling when God took away his shade. (Hey bible nerds!)

Anyways. I've decided that every time I have one of these moments, it's an opportunity for me to break my "God in a Box" attitude.

Recently, I confessed to one of my sisters that I felt like a real sloth. If you can't tell, I can be dramatic in my description of things, but none the less…it doesn't invalidate what I felt. See, I really, and I mean REALLY enjoy my alone time. Genuinely just as much as I enjoy adventures and time with friends. But anyways… I'm a single 29 year old woman that loves to cuddle up on her couch with a good meal, her Anthropology candle all while binge-watching Vampire Diaries, How to Get Away with Murder or whatever other thriller/sci-fi show you can think of. I even get giddy about it. Now this doesn't mean I don't love a good adventure outdoors and some fresh air -- but just keeping it funky; I go from one extreme to the other. I'm the rare bird that does not suffer from FOMO.

So why is this an issue? Well. Because I'm also a girl who wants to be married and thinks that expecting "Mr. Man" to knock on my door on purpose is a bit of a stretch. But - in true call myself out fashion…that last sentence was my "God in a Box" coming out. My new fear…well frankly…my forever fear is that

If I'm not helping God, then God can't help me.

Now, HOW. RIDICULOUS. DOES THAT. SOUND!?

Chill out sis. Not ridiculous at all. Because the last time I checked, that's what media is constantly feeding us. "If you don't go get it, no one's going to get it for you. If you don't get after it, your dreams will die."

I do believe there is a healthy balance of "closed mouths don't get fed," but I also think we'd be a bit naive to ignore that there are a few things that just need to line up in our favor. We don't have as much control as we think we do. Take celebrities for example. Do you honestly think Rihanna is the best singer in the world? Or do you think there could maybe be a few people that worked really hard, sound better, and just didn't make it?

There is a divine favor in our lives that we simply cannot ignore, and if we take a step back from our big headed, misguided ideas that we really can manifest everything that happens to us, we'd realize that there's a master author out there that simply put, doesn't need us for anything.

You're notthat powerful…

I'm not here to tell you that you don't have power. I'm certainly also not saying that you can't affect the space you play in. I do believe that one thing affects the other and what we do in this world ripples. HOWEVER. I am a firm believe that God doesn't need me, or you. He wants us; and the sooner I can healthily distinguish between the two, the less pressure I might feel to want to make the world turn on its axis.

God doesn't need you to have it all figured out. He doesn't need you to make sure that people never make mistakes or that it's your responsibility to fix every issue in the space you dwell in. He didn't ask you to translate apocalyptic literature perfectly or be the human wikipedia of Genesis. God doesn't need me to help him find my husband. He doesn't need me to manipulate situations or make sure that everyone else is clear on what he's called me to do!

What God does want from me is to point as many people as I can to my sweet Jesus and prepare my fields for rain. AHA MOMENT: The old testament called us to love others as we love ourselves. The new testament calls us to love others as Jesus loves his church. That also means people you don't agree with (another think piece on that coming later)!

All the above to say: I think when we carry on as if God needs us, for anything, we put him in a box that is entirely too small.

Every time we bump into a moment that confuses the living daylights out of us, we get a chance to say…That God Guy is WILD! He's a crazy author, that writes crazy stories, and I actually understand very little about how this here world works.

So how do you actually take God out of the Box?

1. DREAM YOUR DREAMS. The big ones. The wild ones. The ones where you can change the world. Be like Esther walking into King Xerxes court when that would typically mean death if not invited.

2. Be NEEDY. God wants us to come to him like children. Children always NEED something. They are dependent. Dream the dreams where it is impossible to do it all on your own. The ones where things have to align in your favor. Let God show up and be BIG.

3. Die and resurrect to your dreams. Over. And Over. And Over again. Don't be afraid to readjust. Don't be afraid of the perceptions of other people. Dare to take risks. Don't be afraid to change your mind! And note* the people who would judge you are usually the ones too scared to be you.

Take God out of the box and let him amaze the crap out of that tiny brain of yours ;).

Hugs,

CB